What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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Jack and Jill went down the hill. And were lost and burnt in hell.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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