Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

American healthcare.

ekoj

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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