What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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What's brown, hairy and goes up and down? A kiwifruit in an elevator.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone!

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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I got shot, you laughed

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live babies

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Turtles

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did you ever see a butter fly?

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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American healthcare.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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Is Carly smart? No.

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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what happened to the man who ran straight into a brick wall he bounced off it, fell back, stumbled. he lifted his head up, looked at it, put his arm to his head. got up, groaned, dusted himself down, and walked towards the pub.

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Religion

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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