A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

whats disappointing and not funny? this joke. ouch.

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

A miserable man committed suicide.

What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...