What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple??? You... Lol jk no there could be alot of things like getting raped, the holocaust, me killing your children i mean someone killing your children. Because if it was me you would know it was me and file a report and i would be arrested and be sent to jail. And in jail i would try my hardest to stay alive brcause if i died that would suck. I would also try not to drop the soap beacuse i might get rapped by some prisib mate, also the floors are quite dirty and that would guve me any type of bacteirial infection like the stupid yeats infection or maby the persob who takes it from me when i finnish would get aids cause it dropped on the floor and who knows were it was. Then he would die from aids and his wife and or kids would be sad and set up a funeral were a preist would stand in akward silence cause the guy murderd the preists father so he wouldnt be mean an ruin the funeral but he wouldnt say anything nice. But after the funeral the preist would go back home and smoke a cigarette because he has started an unhealthy habbit just like millions of people around the world. When will people learn that it kills you faster than cancer well some cancers are quite quick and painless like a head tumor. But most tumors are able to be saved because the doctors are smart these days coming from yale or havord universitys and what not. Most peopel want to take the easy way out by just working at kinkos or wallmart. Both jobs are shit wich is why im probably going to go there cause no one else will except me in there offices or departments. I think its the fact i look like a pedofile trying to kill babys but you know how life is short and difficult to control but you have one life why waste it. Stupid emo kids trying to cut emselfs and shoot themselfs so they dont have to deal with theirs or their partners periods because the other day coming back from mc donalds this guy almost hit me with his car and threw a cup at me for some strange reason but hey not my problem unless he was my first victim?...... Lol jk i have never killed anyone and im not that creapy... Awks POTATO!!!

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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