How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? the pigment in their skin.

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Badabing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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