Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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