What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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