Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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Bob Saget that is all

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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95556

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? A black man eating fried chicken.

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Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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