A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

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Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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I am quite mature.

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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What did man who had diarrhea say to the other man? "I have to go to the toilet."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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