U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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