Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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whats green and lives in the water

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Id like to apologize for the one below (near the end yeah at the very end yeah that near you fuck!) When I said I give candy to etc etc I did mean I do not give candy to... Well... Nothing male, and I do not apologize, thank you. Shortie: Me as a Sociopath vs Sociopath with faster gunplay: So A Sociopath moved into my neighborhood, he arrived at my place and said hey you? You the sociopa... "BOOM" Moral: Shoot first, listen later... And if you hear something keep shooting... Anyway that was not the Sociopath but I got him eventually.

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops