What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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How many athiests does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

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It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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swag

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops