Your momma's so fat, she's at risk of a number of cardio-vascular problems, including high blood pressure, leading to heart disease, stroke, type II diabetes, and a premature death. She also has an elevated risk of contracting cancer.

What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

I'm tired.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

Want to hear a joke? No.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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