Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Matthew Wyckoff

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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