two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops