Carlton

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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The government makes a good decision

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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the cow goes moo

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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