Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops