Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops