roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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