Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

What fires shots? A gun

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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