Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops