Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

it

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

what's funny about war? nothing!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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