Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

a black man walks out of popeyes

Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

What's long hard and black A drain pipe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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