What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

every knight i see an owl at window

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops