Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Sex

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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