What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red Violets are blue My walls are yellow

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops