what did the orange say to the apple? hi

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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