why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This is an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops