People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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