What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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guess what? bannanas

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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alert("Hello");

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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