Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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Lockerbie bombing

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Anti jokes are funny

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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amy copied adams haircut :0

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

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Why Because

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minorities

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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