What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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DERP

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A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

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CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

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i like potatoes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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