Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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live babies

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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