Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Hello, I am Sergent Henry Orange. I'm afraid your husband was shot down by an enemy aircraft. I'm sorry, he was a brave man.

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Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I`ve got a car behind me. Don`t worry about that you have aids.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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