What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. A.Knock knock B. Who's there? A.Not Susie

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A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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