whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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