There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

it was all Tagart

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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