How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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A man sat down Then he stood up

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

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Liars go to hell! -God

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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