Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops