Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops