Poop

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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What's blue? The sky.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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