Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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what is one black person on the moon? Anser: a problem What is all the black peaple on the moon...... a solution.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Boom! Splat! You'll never know.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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dildo

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Poop

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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