Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black succeeds

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Global Warming.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i like potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops