I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

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Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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62

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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Chocolate rain Awesome!

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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