Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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the cow goes moo

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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