How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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to see a bad joke look above

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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