WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

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Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

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No.

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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