What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Man U

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...