Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops