How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Why was rebecca crying? Because her mum had just died in a house fire!!!

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What is green and slow Grass.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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What's 1+1? 69.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

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Why so serious ?

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops