What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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The Labour Party.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

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What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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How you know when dislextic

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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