What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

How does a printer work? You plug it in.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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