There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

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marble

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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I hate you.

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What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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A man buys free health care...

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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