Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

What is the siilarity between Justin beiber and pinoccio? they both waant to be real boys

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

...Jack Vale

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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